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Aric

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Aric is like a pizza with anchovies, a pizza shit. Plus a faggot. He is only known by his dedicated rivalry with the great and mighty Carson Sue. Even so, he did actually have a life before, which is most certainly unknown. Here as an anon wiki contributor, I will tell you the story of this OP.

Aric was born in the great lands of the Shire in 1492. His family moved around the universe to multiple galaxies until they settled in Salem, Washington. By this time, Aric was already 230 years old, and was exhausted. At this place, he met Carson Sue, the great overlord of all.

During the course of Aric's life before college, he was a successful businessman from Harvard University in Vermont. He majored in OP Studies and later became an OP himself at the age of 47. From there he was hired by Hasbro to work out deals with fuckboys and became a successful businessman. He spent most of his time browsing the /r/furry and /r/spacedicks subbreddits of reddit mostly masturbating. He did this for about 200 years constantly without any sleep before finally settling down in Salem and meeting Carson.

Once he met Carson Sue, he immediately hated him. He ran to him and shouted, "I WILL NOT FEED YOUR BIRDS," on live television. Humiliated, Carson turned into a unicorn and blasted Aric with his anal powers turning Aric into french toast. It took 700 years before Aric became normal, and was traumitized. He developed a tragic fear of french toast and never ate breakfast again. He was furious at Carson for humiliating him, so the next day he blocked his house with marshmallows. Carson would then burn the marshmallows and turn Aric into french toast. This occured for 900 years before Aric's death in 2090. In death, the war wages, but since Carson outlived Aric he was crowned victor.

A tragic life for a near normal person, Aric was someone only notable for his loss. People like this are usually stoned to death in the early ages, but now if you did that you would be called racist, sexist, homophobic, transphobic, and other terms used by an every day feminist. Even so, Aric is still considered to be like a pizza with anchovies.

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